Automatic (How I Wish)

i feel like falling
in and out of you
my decision to be here
is so limited
sharing causes straining
and bleeding is an everyday thing
your worries are only yours
and the seed that has sown
is barely growing
what we deserve is not in the cards
that have been dealt
years are years
and where do we go from here
in the latter, i struggle in the hopes
of hopefully reletting this control
to you
we've been here before
and it's slope is to slippery for me
i want to drown
just to see if you would save me
what would be the words
i would hear
as you try to bring me back to life
would it be more than all of your naggings for sex
day after day after day after day after day
would you eat a bag of stale chips
it's so old now
make love to you, hell, let me
let me make love with a passion that is so driven
by the intimacy we share rather than your urged words